Building Your Beauty Business From Scarcity Vs. Inspiration

Hello, my friend. Welcome back to The Modern Hair Stylist podcast. I'm gonna talk about something that's a little bit personal for me today. It's a journey that I have had to go through and I still go through every now and then, but definitely not as much as I first did in the first couple years of my business, um, and that is the battle of scarcity with our own businesses and our own mindset, all right?

I think that it's really easy for us as specifically focused and inspired, successful, motivated business owners to be very aware of the risks or possibilities of things going wrong tomorrow. And I have literally gone to therapy over this because there's, like, two consistent mindset demons that I have in my brain. Like, and this has been my common theme for the past, like, with basically all of my adult life. Number one is boys.

It's always boys. Boys are always occupying my brain and making me want to die and spiraling and putting me into chaos. Uh, uh, it's a constant state of anxiety for me. The second thing is my business.

It's the money. It is the will I be okay financially? Will I land on my feet? Will I lose the momentum and the impact that I have, the beautiful thing that I've created?

And genuinely, whenever I go to therapy, it's always talking about one or the other. And so I'm very well-versed on this topic by now, and I wanted to address it today because I think that it's super relevant to right now when the world outside of our business is so- uh, and our lives is so unpredictable, so scary, such a massive roller coaster, and I think that can very easily affect how we show up in our business and h- how, what our mindset is around our business. And it can oftentimes lead to poor decisions that put us in a worser place than where we could've been if we approached our business with less reactivity, because I know for me, I have had to learn my lesson the hard way, like, a lot of times, and still to this day I still make mistakes because of this stuff. And so I really want to just speak to you today about feeling the scarcity of the business and making sure that we are approaching things from a data-driven, non-biased perspective as much as we possibly can, getting real with you about my experience and what has helped me and all the things.

How's that sound, Jodi Brown? I love this conversation. I think it's so important, and it, like, impacts entrepreneurs in more ways than I think they realize. And so I think that this is gonna be so helpful breaking this down and what this can look like in your business.

Yeah. So I, for a while now, for the past couple years, I think that at the beginning of my journey of being a business owner, I kind of felt as if reflecting on my experience as a business owner, looking for mentorship, looking for advice, learning and trying to be in the right rooms, right? I f- I ve- I found that there was a lot of times in which the messaging that was shared with me made me feel very reactive and scared and like I had to take action or else the world was gonna end, basically. Right.

And what I found was that shit absolutely is effective. Mm-hmm. It makes you take action. Like, it makes you work.

Fear is a great motivator. Like- 100%. very great motivator, and it also psychologically blinds you. Like, it completely, 'cause of our cave people brains, right?

Fear and m- and motivational fear makes you very blind to the bigger picture. Right. And so what this ended up making for me was really great results, like, awesome results. Mm-hmm.

But with the burnout that came with it, the resentfulness of what I had created, the, the, "I do not fucking feel like showing up and doing this anymore because it's so exhausting, because I'm so high on adrenaline all the time when I'm working on these things." Mm-hmm. And those results are from me working my ass off. They're not from me working smartly.

They're from me just working so many hours in which if I was not acting out of fear or out of scarcity or out of reactivity, I may have been able to get the same results in half the work, in half the time, half the energy. And what ends up happening is, is we get super fucking burnt out when fear is our only motivator. And again, like I said, we make unwise, reactive decisions. Mm-hmm.

And I recently, I did a big class and it was called the Client Experience Glow Up Party. Right. And the reason I went about making that class the theme that it was, party, coming together as a community, giving you fun and exciting and cool innovative strategies, was because I know that a lot of the industry is in a space in which that is needed. I'm not gonna just pretend everything is rosy- roses and daisies, not in my own life, not in everybody else's, whatever it may be.

I'm not just gonna sit here and pretend that everything's great and that you shouldn't do anything, right? But I try my best to deliver my message in a way in which I'm just being real with you and I'm looking at the data and that I'm giving it to you in an encouraging way, because we know that positive reinforcement is much more sustainable, more likely to actually work and stay and have momentum continuously, versus negative reinforcement causes issues in the short term and the long term. Mm-hmm. And so I did this party-themed thing because I wanted people to have fun with building their business again, and maybe solving the problems that they may have, versus doing it in a way where if they don't do this stuff, then everything's gonna fail and crumble.

I relate to that so much at the beginning, and I also went to therapy for this. I had this intense feeling that if I took my foot off the gas for a second, everything would come crumbling down, right? And I think that's the part that we don't think about when it comes to building from that place. It's like, yes, people will do a lot more to escape pain than they will to get to a certain result, and that's why that's so effective.

But also, it's like, at what cost and for how long? Yeah, dude. I think it's a very common thing that not enough people talk about. Like, when I was building my clientele from scratch in a brand-new area, and things weren't working for me, of course it was super disappointing and I was very unmotivated because I wasn't getting results, right?

The things that we would try that don't end up working out for us, then don't reward us with any dopamine, and then stop us from wanting to actually show up. Right. And so I would try a different thing, and then I would go to this other thing, and then I would be like, "Wait, this is the problem." And I thought that I found the solution or I found the problem, or I wanted, like, a magic wand.

Like, "Oh, this is the one thing that's stopping my growth, or wh- stopping me from getting what I want." Right. And I think that a lot of people are looking for that magic wand, and it just doesn't fucking exist. Mm-mm.

Because your growth is a monster mash of so many different things. Right. Like, there are so many aspects to your performance as an entrepreneur and in a business. And I think that it's unrealistic to think that, "Oh, this next new thing is going to solve all of your issues."

100%. But I also think that if you are gonna try something, we have to give it enough time to work, because that's what also ends up happening, is we're looking for the fastest solution in the quickest way possible because we are scarce. Because we're scarce with our time, because if we f- if we don't figure this out right now, and if it doesn't work, then we've wasted all this time, and I just wanna move on to the next thing. But I think having a plan and just sticking to it has been so peaceful.

Mm. It's been so effective. Mm-hmm. Like, I literally, this past week, went through a spiral where I was like, "Oh my God, everything's trash.

The business is trash. I'm trash." Like, I was, like, freaking out, right? And then I literally just sat down and I, like, first off, looked at my plan- Right.

I looked at my numbers- Mm-hmm. I considered the facts. I spoke with somebody about all these things to get an outside perspective, 'cause I knew I was spiraling. Right.

I was like, "Everything is just fucking fine." Literally, everything is cool, dude. Like, calm down. And it's really awesome that I have this beautiful plan and these numbers that can just tell me exactly what direction I need to go in.

Wow. And what I've a- what I've done in the past that has really bit me in the ass is I've made very fast decisions that weren't a part of the plan because of me feeling reactive or me not taking into consideration the facts. Mm-hmm. And I didn't give the main thing enough time to work.

I didn't try the one thing, track how it's working- Right. consider the bigger picture around it, and maybe tweak it and try to make it something a little bit better the next time that I try it. Mm-hmm. Or give myself a deadline for when I'll stop, right?

Because it's really easy to be like, "Okay, I put this one post out here, and this was the post that was supposed to get me clients," or, "I changed my website, and this was the, this was the copy that was, uh, the picture that was supposed to make my website better." Right. And then you don't get the new clients immediately, within the week, within the month, within the year even, right? And then you feel like, "Oh, then it's not my website, then it's this other thing."

And then it's, like, on to the other thing, and you haven't even given the first thing a chance to actually work, see, track what's working, what's not working with it, and make the pivots to optimize it as much as you can. And you haven't given yourself, like... Uh, I find it's really great to be like, "Okay, if this, if, if I've tried everything by X date, right, fine, then I'll give it up and I'll try another thing." Right.

But I think that a lot of times, we just jump onto a new thing without actually taking into consideration the facts. So true. And sometimes we will try something, and then one client will say something shitty about it. Hmm.

Like, the one out of 200 people will give you a certain piece of feedback. Mm-hmm. And when you are showing up reactively in your business, then that one person and the one thing that they say will become your entire narrative. Right.

Right? Because our cave people brains are trained to hone in on the negative, and it becomes all of our thoughts and all of our perspective. And so when we don't look at the data, when we don't look at the bigger picture, when we don't take into consideration the good, right, then we just automatically will assume that this is the truth. Mm.

And when we don't have a good understanding of our data, when we don't take a step back, and we don't have other perspectives to share these things with, then it can be hard to get out of that mindset. So many times, I will have people t- tell me, "Oh, my clients said that they don't like it when X," right? Right. And I'll be like, "Okay, how many clients told you that?"

They'll be like, "Three." I'm like, "Okay, how many clients have you seen in the past week?" Like, "20." I'm like, "Okay, did your other clients say that?"

Right? Like, 'cause 3 out of 20 is a very small percentage. Right. You know?

So, I think that scarcity can also create that, and I think that just making sure that we take a step back and we look at the bigger perspective is a really big healing, uh, thing that we can do for ourselves. You're so right. There is that negativity bias, and I think it's, like, not easy to overcome, but once you do, you can start to make decisions a whole lot differently. And so let's talk a little bit about making your plan and making those business decisions from that place of inspiration.

Like, what does that look like? What is the, what does it feel like and look like once you get out of that space of scarcity?I think, like, when you have built a plan that you've done the work to build- Mm-hmm. I think that that creates more confidence and more hope in it working out for you, and you knowing what decision is the best.

Like, sometimes you just have to put your reps in, right? Because you're not gonna know, you're not gonna have historical experience that has taught you the lessons that you need to be able to make smarter decisions in the future. And so, that's why I say that there's no such thing as failure in business, because if you're failing, you're learning an essential lesson that sets you up for more success in the future. I've had the worst-case scenario, catastrophizing thoughts in my brain come true.

And after they come true, you realize that the fear is so much bigger and badder than the actual circumstance- Yes. than when it actually happens. And that has also been really helpful in being able to calm my brain down when I know I'm being a little bit irrational, is remembering, I have thought similar things like this before, and it actually came true. And then when it came true, it was not as nearly terrible as it was, as I- as I thought it was gonna be.

Yeah. And, I have so much experience at this point that I'm smart enough to know how to get myself out of it if it does happen. And so, what I also recommend that you remind yourself, an exercise that one coach did with me one time that I do with my students now, and what I'd recommend that you do, is like, if you had to make $500 tomorrow with, from scratch, right? Like, no clients, right?

What would you do? And then list out, like, all the things that you could do to make that happen with the skill set and the network that you have now, the resources that you have now, right? And I think that's where knowledge, and I talked about this in our, in our shitting on ChatGPT episode. Mm-hmm.

It's so cool that knowledge can, knowledge and experience, like, nobody can take that away from you. So true. Right? You may be at the beginning of your career where you haven't had these reps yet, right?

But maybe you have been in a, a, uh, but you have had some sort of life experience that has set you up for something, you have some sort of skill set that has gotten you to where you are today. You are a smart human being, much smarter than we give ourselves credit for. And you are capable, and you have more resources than you realize, as well, too. You are capable of making really cool shit happen for yourself in the hardest, scariest times.

So true. And so I recommend, my friends, when you do, when you are catastrophizing, maybe go ahead and, like, write out all the worst-case scenarios, and then write what would you do if this came true? Like, how would you handle it if it came true? And then you will logically, on paper, realize, oh, there are actual solutions for these things if they do happen.

And it's a really easy way to calm yourself down. But it's also strategic as well, too, because maybe these things will happen. Right. Right?

So now you've thought about the solution instead of just freaking spiraling about the problem. And you get it out of your brain, too. I think getting it out of the brain, out of, like, out of your freaking chaotic tornado in your brain, and putting it out into the world automatically makes it more, less, it makes it less scary. Because it's now, you're not confronting it, right?

And anything that you confront when it comes to fear really loses a lot of credibility. Because now you're facing it, and you're like, "Oh, this isn't as bad as I thought it was going to be," I guess. Yes, that's so true. And it's like, even like, I think the classic scarcity example is, like, raising your prices, right?

I- I think that triggers a- a scarcity instinct in even the most, like, abundance-minded people, right? Like, there's, like, this little something in you, and you're like, "Oh, could I really-" Mm-hmm. "do this? Could I get away with this," right?

And I think it's like, you know, if you look at the worst-case scenario, I think everyone thinks, "All my clients are gonna leave me." Okay, but are all of your clients gonna leave you? Is that, realistically, are all of your clients gonna leave you? And if they do, what are you gonna do about it, right?

I think that's such an important, like, a great exercise to go through. Because when it comes to price increases, um, and maybe you can talk a little bit on this and how you can approach that specifically, 'cause I feel like it- it really does trigger that scarcity piece, especially in, you know, when a lot of your clients are talking about inflation and all of those different things. So, if you are someone who has, like, a business and you're like, "I know I need to do a price increase. However, my brain is telling me, like, absolutely not, fight, flight, or freeze," like, how do you work through that?

Yeah. Oh my God, this is such a good question. Um, I would say, first off, of course, like, you wanna make sure that things look good on paper. And this is where I go back to, like, looking at the actual numbers.

Like, what, uh, what is actually factually happening, right? Because when I have a student who comes into my program, I have them go through all the numbers and figure out and have a really deep understanding of their current pricing, figure out what are all the factors of the price increase, what kind of price increase you would do in that case, are you ready, are you not, on paper? And that will automatically give you so much more confidence because you've done the work and you have the logical understanding. However, a lot of the time, it still absolutely does not defeat the fear.

Mm-hmm. It 100% doesn't. But, it can be very helpful, and logically make sure, it's like tangibly, make sure that you actually are making a safe decision, right? Because there is a possibility that if you do a price increase that is out of the range that you can afford, that it is a risk, it is a possibility.

As is any decision that you make in your business, there will always be some sort of risk, right? So, making sure that you understand your numbers, making sure that you're leaning into trusted resources and peers to review your decisions is really helpful. And then on top of the peers and mentors as well, I think no matter what, the fear is going to be there. Yeah.

And it's not gonna go away. And it may come in waves, it may be better this day, it may be less, less great tomorrow, or whatever it may be, right? Or there may be something that happens that completely triggers you and makes you feel like, "Oh wait, I'm not doing the price increase," or, "I'm not gonna raise it $10, I'm gonna raise it $5 instead."Leaning into accountability, I think, is really helpful as well, because you know, like your logical brain knows that this is the right thing for you, right?

But your inner child is trying to keep you so safe that it's trying to talk you out of this stuff. And surrounding yourself with real people who are there for you, who know that you'll be okay, who can walk you through it, I think is really powerful. And so like when people are in my community, when... In my programs, when they say that they're gonna have a price increase, I hold them to it.

Or they say they're gonna fire a client, I hold them to it. I say, "Okay, post in the Facebook group when you've made the decisions about this price increase, and when you're gonna send out this email. We're gonna follow up with you about it." Right.

Because we are only human, right? Like, we are genuinely only one human being running our business, and it's very lonely. And when things are lonely and you're the only person who this kind of affects, or the only person that's, uh, looking out for you basically- Mm-hmm. it can be really easy for you to not do it, or let the fear take over and you not pull through with the decision.

And I th- I think this goes back to that historical proof conversation that you, that you brought up, too, is it's like what you're describing is almost like, you know, yes, you're, you're almost like getting that accountability, but when you're in community, you're almost leaning on the other people's historical proof to show you that it is possible, and that you are able to do these things, and that no, not everyone is losing all their clients, and no, not everyone... You know, all of those conversations that can happen and get in our heads and spiral us. And I think there's so much value and so much power in that when it comes to defeating that scarcity-based thinking. I completely agree.

And I... It's so funny. I, I, I've realized this over time, like this common theme. I'll ask people about their last price increase that they had, and I'll ask...

And it, it'll be even like two, three months ago that they raised their prices. Right. I'll ask them, "Okay, give me your top three services, and what the price was and what it is now." Right.

And they can never tell me what the price was. And I just- Right. think that's an interesting phenomenon. I just think it's like in the moment, it feels like such a huge difference.

It's like this earth shattering, like if I'm going from 45 to 65, it's gonna go crazy, like that's nuts. Mm-hmm. And then three months later, you can't even tell me what your old price was. So true.

And everything turned out to be okay, right? And it's interesting how like when we're charging the $45, that i- that feels like the standard, right? Like, that feels like what we were supposed to be charging at the time. And then the $65, let's say, it's like something that we almost need to grow into.

Right. It's something that we need to like, uh, break in, I guess, in, in our brains. Mm-hmm. And then once we break into it, it feels so comfortable again, you know?

Like, you, you lean into the comfort of it, and you get re- really like relaxed, I guess you could say. And then when you challenge yourself again for the 75 or the 85, then every... All those feelings of... All the same feelings that you had before come up again, but you've gone through this before, right?

And it co- becomes, definitely becomes a little bit easier every single time that you do it. But, that fear is not gonna completely 100% go away. And like I said, I mean, me and Jodi, we've gone to therapy over this. We've see- we've seeked professional- Literally.

help, okay? And this still shows up for me all the time. Yes. And what I've come to accept is that this is always going to be a thing for me.

Mm-hmm. I, I think the biggest flip in therapy for me, that has been so helpful for me, is just accepting the circumstance. Like, I am s- I'm such a problem solver that I just want the problem to go away. I want the thoughts to just go away, right?

So, I fight them. I try to dig them down. "How can I not think about this?" But what has, what actually helps is instead of wanting to get rid of it or figuring out how to get rid of it, is actually looking at it, thinking about it, reflecting on it.

"Why am I feeling this way?" Getting curious about why I'm feeling this way. And then things become a lot more calm in my brain. Totally.

But the thoughts are still gonna sneak in because it's just a part of our makeup, it's a part of our childhood, and whatever the fuck's showing up for us now as adults. And unfortunately, a lot of those thoughts aren't very helpful for us as human beings, but especially as entrepreneurs. We are playing a very non-primal friendly game as entrepreneurs. So true.

True. And this isn't supposed to feel easy, and noth- nothing is ever supposed to feel perfect, and there will always be risks to the decisions that you make and the business that you have. But, you are a smart enough human being to make it fucking work. You have me in your corner always as a mentor who's rooting you on and hopefully giving you helpful solutions.

And you... There's community out there who is just as motivated and just as scared as you are, that you can lean into to help work through that bullshit when it's going through your brain. And I hope that- Amen. my students listening to this, I hope that you feel as if I have given you those spaces, and I've given you that support, and I'm committed to continuously doing it, because I know how it fucking feels, and it sucks.

So, I hope that you have enjoyed listening to this episode of The Modern Hair Stylist podcast. So much love to you, my friend. Catch you in the next one. Peace out, girl scout.

Bye bye.

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