The Most Underrated Salon Policy

So, I've been teaching this for eons because I'm Gen Z and I am non-confrontational, yet I have extremely, like, strong worldviews. And so- Right. I have always had a salon etiquette policy because my clients see my policy, sign my policy every single time they come to see me. And so- Mm-hmm.

they're able to see, like, I have a salon etiquette policy in which, like, I do not like x behavior within my space. So, that gives a nice prerequisite that hopefully will mitigate anybody bringing uncomfortable topics or behavior into my space, so that way I don't have to deal with it, right? Mm-hmm. And this goes for the sentiment of all policies in my, my philosophy, is can we reduce the behavior instead of having to punish or, or, or, uh, deal with the behavior later, right?

Yeah. Um, so that's why having it as a policy is great, because it reduces the chance of it happening. But what it also does is it creates, es- if your policies are signed and agreed upon and reminded of often, it creates the opportunity or the backing, I guess you could say, for you to be able to enforce it with the understanding that this person signed and agreed to that thing, right? So then you can blame it on the policy versus, like, just like this circumstantial, all of a sudden I'm gonna decide to do this to you.

You know what I mean? It's like, it's not like this person wasn't necessarily warned. And then that brings me to I don't believe that you having this non-confrontational thing exempts you from having to have a conversation with somebody, right? Now, there are so many nuances to this, obviously.

So identity and who you are as a person and who that person is as a person, as far as your client goes, very much is going to change th- the conversation here. But generally, like, you should probably try to tell somebody that what they are saying is making you feel uncomfortable. Or at least try to redirect the conversation. And you absolutely have every right to do both, to- Right.

for, to just, you know, casually be like, "All right. So I'm not really loving this. This is feeling a little bit negative. Like, can we just talk about the weather today?

Or how was your cr- cruise last week," right? Right. You should try that. The second situation is like, "This c- this conversation is honestly making me a little bit uncomfortable.

I'd really prefer that we don't talk about it now or in future appointments. Okay. "And so thank you for respecting that." Then it's kind of like you warn this person, they do it again, you have every right to be like, "Sorry, like, I, I, I already talked to you about this and it seems like it's a common thing that is, keeps on coming up."

Yeah. "It's very uncomfortable for me, so I would prefer that you don't come to see me anymore because of that." So salon etiquette could include, although this could be like a different, a different category, could include, like, children. Hm.

It also could include behavior of th- the children. What it absolutely should include is that, like, it's up to your discretion what the definition of these things mean. So it's like- Right. that's cool that you don't think that this was homophobic, but I think it's homophobic, so therefore it's up to me to decide what that looks like.

Right. You know what I mean? Yes. Yeah.

And then of course, like, no racism, homophobia, transphobia, xenophobia, fatphobia, like, all the phobias , like, none of that will be tolerated- Yeah. within my space, right? And then you can even have within the salon etiquette policy, if this m- if this is what you would like, is like no talks about pol- politics. Like, you could say- Right.

like, that's something that you don't want to have in your space, you know? So one of the thoughts that I had, and this may be irrelevant, was just like how important this is, like, even if you're comfortable with, like, you know, things that are maybe more controversial, like topics... So you're asking, like, so you're asking, like, okay, like, if I'm running a team, then I want to make sure that everybody within the space feels comfortable. Yes, and protect- So like, so then how does that affect, like, how we approach this?

Yeah. My, my answer to that is, like, that's just, that's just a part of, like, the core values of the company, and that needs to be decided upon before somebody's hired. So like- Right. somebody, like when somebody's hired, like, that person needs to be very clear about like what the, what the salon vibe, culture, etiquette- Yeah.

is already. And if that person is not willing to, to, doesn't assimilate to that, then like that's- Right. that's their problem, you know? Well, and even, like, I was even thinking, I wasn't actually thinking of it from that angle.

I was thinking of it from the angle of like making, like this is kind of like your responsibility to make sure that your team members feel safe- Sure. and comfortable. Yeah. Like, so I like both of those angles.

Yeah. But I do think, like, there's, like it's not just about like your own individual comfort level 'cause I know that some people will be like, "But, like, I like having debates and all that kind of stuff." Yeah. But like...

I mean, like for me, like I will, like, ag- so like I, yeah, I guess I'm like thinking, I'm still like thinking more from like my, I feel like it's not really super applicable when it comes to independent stylists because it's like, just like, "Well you're sitting"- Okay. "... in my chair. Like it is what it is," you know?

Yeah, for sure. Definitely is absolutely, it's absolutely applicable in team environments because you want the stylist next to you to feel comfortable and that other- Yeah. stylist's client to feel comfortable. Yes.

Right? Like m- like me, like, doing this person, right, like in my chair, we may feel really great about this topic and we're cool about conversing ba- about it back and forth, but the stylist next to me and the client in their chair may really not be cool with that. So then therefore, like, we need to have this situation. However, again, to, from the other perspective, the salon could just have these are the core values, this is the standard, this is our etiquette, and the client- Yeah.

or the stylist, you get to decide if you wanna be a part of that or not. True. Yeah. Like you don't have to sit in our chair.

You don't have to be- Yup. behind our chairs if you don't- Yeah. like the fact that we like to have these type of conversations. Right.

Yes. Okay. That makes sense. Same with an in- independent stylist.

I, I, I absolutely talk with my clients about serious topics, especially within, when I was within the salon suite. And me and them are cool about that, you know? Yeah. But it's normally because I'm attracting people with similar core values to me and I'm not afraid of a hard or uncomfortable conversation, right?

Yeah. It's just up to each individual and like what they believe and what their core values are. That's true. I love that.

And here's the thing too.My cosmetology teacher said this to me and it really stuck in my brain. She was like, "Rules...", and I, I guess this is a general sentiment but this, she's the first person that I heard say it.

"Rules aren't created until something, rules aren't created until, like, it has to be created," you know? Yeah. So like- Yeah. you know, like, of course, like you wanna try to preemptively, like, cover your ass with your policies.

Like, you wanna predict what may happen and you wanna cover your butt for that. Right. But normally, like, you're not gonna really know, like, every single circumstance that you're gonna wanna cover until, like, it actually happens, you know? So once it does happen, you have the opportunity to update your policies if you want to.

So I think the beauty of having those signed-off expectations is that you are able to create this policy for yourself and then your clients, before they come into the space, are acknowledging this and they are signing off on this, so they know that these are your expectations, right? Something I heard recently, which I think is really, really impactful for me, is that it's hard to pull someone up on something or have a hard conversation if you haven't actually iterated your expectations in the first place. And so, by having these expectations clearly outlined and what you are and are not okay with, it makes you a lot more comfortable in having the conversations that you need to. Yes, and then, like I was just sharing, it also just reduces it, the need to have it in the first place, 'cause it doesn't happen.

So absolutely, putting those things upfront and allowing your client the opportunity to at least see them, whether they read it or not, you know, at least there is something there. And, you know, the way that I, we teach my students to do this, like to get the cli- uh, the policies signed and agreed to every single time, like, you can make it a more prominent thing, you know? Like you can make it like a singular, like, "This is the salon etiquette policy and I really want you to see this, if you see any of my policies." You know?

Right. For example, like masks, you know? I, I know that we're kind of out of the era of masks, majoratively, right? Right.

But, like masks, like before people walked into my space, like they were well aware that like, "You are wearing a mask when you walk into my space." You know? Right. Um, and that was just my tea and, and I was like, "If you don't wanna wear one, you don't have to get service.

It is what it is, and I have the right to refuse service." Yeah. And I think that that's one of the most important things and where, you know, this does help you when you do have to have the conversation, is also making it s- making sure that you state that like, all those things are up to your discretion. Yeah.

Even like the definition of those things, right? Even just from like a legal standpoint, right? So like, you can say, like, uh, you know, uh, "And all of this stuff is up to my discretion," so in like a circumstance in which, let's say, you were to share with somebody, "Hey, this one thing that we sh- that you said is just not making me feel really comfortable and, you know, I feel like that could fall into this type of rhetoric," such as like homophobia or whatever it may be. "No big deal, just calling it out so it doesn't happen again.

I'm not judging you, it's okay. Like, we can just continue forward in our, in our service. Please don't overthink it, I just ha- must address it." Yeah.

Um, and then, you know, move forward. Now let's say this person like claims, like, "Oh, well I didn't say that." Right? Or like, "Oh, that's not homophobic."

Then you can say, "Well," like, b- if we have to, if we have to reference my policies, it does say like, "this is under my discretion of like what the definition of these things mean." Right. Therefore, you know, like if we're getting down to like whether you are gonna be able to sit in my chair or not, like I have, I have, I have just sole discretion of like what the definition of those things are and the reason why I'm gonna refuse service. And, you know, I think that by virtue of just having these things communicated with your preferences and all of that, like, you're really going to, like you mentioned before, like reduce the likelihood that someone who feels entitled to make, you know, homophobic comments or any of those things is gonna sit in your chair.

Like, or, you know, whatever that may be. Like, whatever one of your policies they're violating. Like, if they are literally signing off on this, that's something that is going to mitigate a lot of that, of that risk, 'cause they will be more aware ****** the behavior. Yeah, and vice versa.

It's actually gonna attract the people that you do want and get along with you better. People shop with their core values now, and that's just becoming increasingly so, uh, uh, very true. Yeah. And, uh, you know, I normally am not like, "Put your policies on your website," but like there are definitely absolutely like signals that you can put on your website that I do recommend that can make people understand whether they're in the right space for them or they're not in the right space for them.

Yeah. Uh, and I think that it does both things for you. It reduces those people that you don't want, and it actually can help you get more of the people that you do want. Yeah.

Um, so setting those expectations upfront is great. So, I mean, even besides like the political conversations or the identity conversations... Right. There's other things that can go into, uh, the salon etiquette policy as well too, which I think is helpful.

And you know, you can call this like its own policy if you want to, but even like, children, right? Like, children within the space, behavior of those children, behavior of a human adult individual who like, you know, like belligerent behavior, uh, uh, uh, being, uh, uh, intoxicated. Right. Um, under the influence of drugs.

Uh, I know that we, I, you know what I would've loved that policy at my s- my fucking, um, my first salon that I worked at. I worked at, I worked there for like five years and we were just in this space in which, we were in this area in which like people were just extremely like entitled and oftentimes, you know, not, uh, in the right state of mind. Right. And oftentimes intoxicated, and it just caused so much discomfort for me having to like facilitate those types of people.

Wow. And it was terrible. Wow. And I would've really loved to have some sort of like backup of like, you know, if this is, if we see this, if we judge that you are acting out of character, not in alignment with the salon policy, then we can call it out and we can refuse service, you know?

I would've really enjoyed that. Yeah, and I think like there are ways to, you know, like I mean, when it comes to all of these different things, like you're protecting yourself and you're protecting the client. And you need, like there are policies that I think, as responsible business owners, like for example, children and like being in the space, like we're, have hot tools, we have scissors, we have like all of these different things that could really hurt someone. And at the end of the day, I think like, you know, w- we need to be comfortable making sure that we are comfortable in our space, that people are safe in our space, and that there is, is that, um, expectation of behavior.

So Hunter, how do you...How do you phrase these things when it comes to your policies? Like, is there any guidelines that you can give in terms of, like, how to create this so that you're communicating it in a way that your clients will understand? Well, as far as from a, um, like, on paper situation, uh, we do have- Yeah.

the Advanced Policies Template Vault as, that's included in the Hairstylist Template Vault. Mm-hmm. So, it's on sale at the time we're recording this. So if you guys wanna go check it out, hunterdonaghy.

com, and you'll find it on there somewhere. Awesome. Um, so we have, like, actual templated, you know, situations for it. Mm-hmm.

Um, but otherwise, uh, I think, you know, in today's day and age, I think you can find a good example of a, of a policy that would work for you. Um, but I think what is harder to come up with is, like, how do we talk about it vocally. Right. You know?

Like, it's one thing to be able to have something written down that, like, really lays it out for somebody, but it's another thing to actually, like, have to talk about it. And so, you guys heard a- an example of me kind of calling it out a little bit earlier, but, like, how I normally go about something like this is, like, I would kind of go, like, my first step would be, like, let's say that somebody, like, brings up something that you don't want or that makes you feel uncomfortable or does something that makes you feel uncomfortable. Like, of course, we wanna try to do it kinda casually at first, and hopefully it doesn't happen again, right? Right.

So, like, let's say, like, "Oh, yeah. I totally understand where you're coming from. So, how's the weather?" Or, like- Yeah.

"How was your cruise," right? Um, and then hopefully, hopefully, you know, they maybe get the hint, or- Mm-hmm. maybe they just move on to another topic, they don't bring it back up, whatever it may be. Let's say that it happens every single time.

Let's say that you even try to do that, it somehow gets back to that annoying-ass conversation. We have all been there, right? Um, you need to call it out directly. Right.

Uh, and that's where, you know, I say, like, these communication skills, like, are so important. I don't think that, like, having the, the non-confrontational options upfront are a replacement for the skills of being able to, uh, uh, resolve conflict or have these uncomfortable conversations. And so, like, the next kind of line of offense would be just saying, like, "Hey, so, quite honestly, this just makes me a little bit uncomfortable," right? And, "I don't mean this to...

I don't want this to put you in, u- you, make you feel uncomfortable, the fact that I'm talking about it here with you." Mm-hmm. "I want you to know that, like, it's not fun for me to have to bring this up, and I love having you in my chair, I would love to take care of you today and, like, have a great appointment like we always do, but is it okay if we don't talk about this now or in the future? It makes me feel really, like, weird."

Mm-hmm. "And it stops me from being able to serve you the best way that I can, because I can't give my 100% if I feel weird," right? Right. "So, uh, no judgment.

I don't want you to thi- double, like, overthink this. It's okay. Let's just keep moving forward in the service-" Right. "...

and get 'er done. How was your cruise last week," right? Right. That's how I would go about it.

Right. Very direct. It's kind, it's empathetic. Sometimes people make mistakes.

Some people, sometimes people don't know that they're fucking saying some dumb shit, you know? Like- Right. we're, we're all, we're all only humans. And- Yeah.

this is where I say, you know, like, you also, like, depending on the type of person you are, depending on the type of conversations you wanna have in your space, like, you also have the opportunity to, you know, maybe change people and, like, educate people. Yeah. Like, where they... Maybe people have good intentions, right?

But in, like, eh, but they don't have the education or the understanding to, like, you know, not cause harm or not say a shitty thing. And so, if they are a well-intentioned person then maybe, and you are knowledgeable enough to be able to share with them, like, that knowledge, like, that's such a beautiful opportunity that you have. I think it's so- Yeah. I mean, you are a hairstylist, like, you have so much influence.

I don't think that we recognize how much power and influence we have with people. Yeah. Um, you truly are, like, a change-maker in your community. And I, and I, I pride myself in that, in, like, being a source of, of knowledge for these types of things.

Like, both behind the chair, I've absolutely educated many clients. Like, living in, like, a rural-ass farmland, Pennsylvania, I've absolutely had very well-intentioned people sit in my chair who absolutely did not know how to go about those things- Right. in a proper way, and they didn't have the education. And I was able to create that space for them- Mm-hmm.

to feel safe and, like, to share that education with them. But I'm not saying that you have to, especially if you don't have the knowledge to. You can just shut it down, right? Right.

And that's how I would go about it. So at the end of the day, like, you are basically deciding on, like, you know... I, I think there's almost, like, two pieces to it, right? About, like, you know, the etiquette, and then also just the conversations you wanna have.

I feel like that's kind of, like, the secondary part of it, what you're describing, right? Totally. Yeah, and it's a personal choice, and that doesn't have to necessarily be documented, right? I think, like, the more prepared you are for anything, the better it'll go.

So, like, you know, if you want to write out for yourself, like, "When this happens, then I will go about it this way." Right. And you decide on that, great, right? But, will that happen...

Will that work for every circumstance? No. Okay. So, I wanna ask you a question then.

So, say, like, a lot of the time I think when we are introducing policies, it's because something has happened that has made that policy a necessity, right? And sometimes, like, if we could be proactive, that's better, but, like, say you are someone who is rolling out a new policy, like a new salon etiquette policy, um, to your existing clients, right? Is there a specific way that you would go about that? Like, do you call out, "Okay, I've added the salon etiquette section."

Like, what does that look like when you're- Yeah. rolling out new policies? Hmm. Circumstantial, but the salon etiquette pol-policy could be very straightforward.

And yeah, if it is something that you wanna really make sure everybody's aware of, and you don't have, like, amazing systems that just do it for you- Mm-hmm. like we do in MSM- ... then you could send out an email to everybody and be like, "Hey, just wanted everybody to know we did have an update to our salon etiquette policy. You can view that one and all of our other policies at this, in this document below."

Perfect. So, boom, there you go. Review it. Is there anywhere that you absolutely should not be talking about your policy?

That you're adding? No, not a salon etiquette policy. I don't think there's anything wrong with that. Uh, I mean, of course, I don't think, like, I don't think we should be going on our social medias and just like ranting about our policies.

Uh, I do believe, you know, like I said, like core values, like, I think honestly talking about salon etiquette could help you, you know? Yeah. I think that especially, I think that it could help clients feel safe in a space, right? For sure.

Like if they, if they, they... People are very nervous to walk into certain spaces, especially depending on who they are, and like if they can see that you do have a salon etiquette policy, let's say in your story highlight, that says like, you know, "None of this bullshit will be tolerated," that this person like really cares about, I think that that can absolutely be helpful for you in so many different ways and also help you make an impact in your community, right? So that's kind of like my, uh- Yeah. my anomaly as far as like, you know, ranting about policies on, in your social media.

Totally. And there's, oh, I mean, I feel like it's, there's always nuance, right? But I love that, I love that you said that there's a way to like utilize it to share essentially your core values. I agree with you.

Yeah. Absolutely. So when it comes to the salon etiquette policy, is there anything that you want to add, Hunter? Anything that we, that you want people to know when they're either implementing or rolling this out?

So I shared with you guys, like, I guess, very first line of offense is like non-confrontational, right? Like you have your client sign read and integrate to your policies every single time so you don't ne- you're not necessarily talking about it, right? You're just showing them, you're giving them the opportunity to understand. Second is casually trying to redirect the conversation.

Third is directly calling it out. Finally, with empathy, if that matches what the soc- situation is. Last step, firing them, right? Mm-hmm.

Um, if you gave them the, the warning, if you called it out, if they're clear, you know, that this is like something that is not tolerated within the space. And again, super circumstantial. Please understand that I understand there's nuance to this conversation 'cause this is important to call that out. Mm-hmm.

But in a lot of cases, can you really just go straight to firing somebody because they weren't aware of, you know, the harm that they were doing in that space, right? Now, again, super... that is extremely nuanced and circumstantial. Like especially coming from me, you know, like I'm a privileged white male, right?

Like, like I mean especially with a woman-dominated field, I mean, inappropriate behavior from men particularly, like absolutely, like fucking fire them. Like get them out of your space. You know, like I'm not saying that like those types of extreme situations, like absolutely they should be handled with like, "Get the fuck out of my space." You know?

Um, but in other circumstances where maybe it's just like a political conversation in which it's not extremely offensive to... because of who you are, right? Right. Then I think that there could be opportunity for you to at least try to say, "This is making me uncomfortable.

Don't do it again." And then if they do it again, they were made aware, there's no excuse, and you can... you have the right to let them go because they signed and agreed to your salon etiquette policy. And we are gonna talk all about how to do that in next week's episode.

So - Oh, yeah. if the salon etiquette policy fails and there is someone you need to let go of, we're gonna talk about how you can do that without a ton of backlash next week. I love, I love... I feel like that's literally like the very first thing that people found value in learning from me was like how to word things, right?

Like how to talk to clients about shit. And so I'm really looking forward to giving you guys like my most up-to-date perspective and like strategy for how to let people go. You know, how to fire people in all circumstances. Um, because it's a skill that we need to have and it can go wrong, can go right- Yeah.

and I'm gonna share with you the right way, uh, next week. So tune in. Love it. Thank you so much for tuning into the Modern Hairstylist podcast.

Thank you, Jodi Brown, as per usual. Peace out, girl scout. Bye-bye.

End of transcript. © 2026 Hunter Donia LLC.