Why High Performers With ADHD Need Systems

If you know anything about me, it is that I am an ADHD mother effort, okay? Like, that's why I got Jodi Brown here on the podcast with me every time we record, because I will go so off track, I will be all over the place, and honestly, I'm not mad about it. Like, I own who I am, I know who I am. I know what my patterns are.

I'm very privileged to have gotten diagnosed with ADHD from a very young age, so I have such an intense awareness around it, and I'm actually very proud of the fact that I've been able to manage, understand, and use my ADHD to help me scale my businesses. And I think that a lot of high performers can relate to me and my experiences, and so I know that you, my friend, listening to this, because you're a beauty professional who actually gives a shit about your business, right, 'cause that's why you're tuning in here, I'm assuming that you're some sort of high performer, and I'm assuming because you're in this industry that you might have a case of ADHD or just hairdresser squirrel brain, right? And so what I'm hoping to do here today is, first off, make you feel validated and make you just feel more awareness around your patterns, because I think that's, like, the biggest thing when it comes to ADHD, um, but also just make sure that you understand that th- there is a world in which you can maintain your high performance, you can make it so things don't fall through the cracks, you can finish the projects and the ideas that are half started, you can create a beautiful scaled business and be consistent even with having ADHD or the s- crazy busy and overwhelming life that you have or the lack of time that you have. And I've, again, had the privilege and experience of having to work with my ADHD and figure out how I can put systems in place to make it so it's a lot easier for me to be able to follow through consistently, and that's what I'm gonna be talking about here today.

And again, we have Jodi Brown here as per usual to facilitate our conversation to make sure that my brain stays on track to give you the best experience. So hello, Jodi Brown. How are you doing today I am doing so good. Um, I'm really excited to get into this.

I think, uh, so many stylists, including myself, can relate to getting so excited and being so creative and having all these amazing big ideas to get projects off the ground and then struggle a little bit in that maintenance phase once some of that excitement has worn off. And so think this is gonna be a really helpful conversation for the creatives who are ambitious high performers in the industry. Yeah, absolutely. I think that, like, one of the biggest things that really brought me so much awareness around my ADHD, which then i- then in turn helped me, uh, with managing it within my business as a business owner, was I- when I lived with my ex for, like, four to five years, he had, like, diag- it's not to put your business out there, dude, but I don't know, um, y- he had, like, diagnosed OCD, like, straight up, like, s- traditional stereotypical OCD, okay?

So it's like what you think of when you think of somebody with OCD. Like, you want the house to be, like, perfectly clean and everything to be in order and in its place, you know? It's very much like what you think of when you think of OCD. And OCD and ADHD together in one household is very conflicting.

It's very, very much like the complete opposite situation, and for both of us, I believe that it was actually very healthy in one way or another that we were able to become so much more aware of our own patterns and then be challenged to manage those things and to change them. And one of the biggest things I think that comes with, like, s- a situation like that where maybe you are a parent of somebody with ADHD listening to this and you feel as if, you know, they just don't listen or they just can't follow through with things and you just don't know how to offer empathy without making it an excuse, right? That's, like, what really challenges me and I think a lot of other people with ADHD, is that, like w- at what point is- are we being aware of it and then app- a- and then allowing ourself grace, but then are we allowing ourself too much grace to where we aren't doing anything about it, right? So, like, for example, if m- like, I would just come into the door of our house and I would just put my shoes wherever 'cause when I'm taking off my shoes at the front door, I'm not thinking about taking off my shoes at the front door.

I'm thinking about going up the stairs and doing whatever my next task is. That's how my brain works. That's how my ADHD brain works. It's always on to the second and third task.

It's not focusing on what's happening right now in the moment. And so I would just throw my sh- shoes anywhere instead of putting them on the shoe rack, for example. And m- my ex-partner at the time would tell me how, how it made him feel so neglected. It made him feel like I was being ignorant towards his feelings because it, like, really affected him and it really made him feel like I just wasn't listening or I didn't care, right?

And so it's kind of like two things can be true. I have this actual disorder that, like, genuinely affects every single moment of my life. Like, the way I act, the way that I do anything, and the way that I think, right? It, it genuinely affects me, therefore it creates these symptoms, it creates these behaviors, and that is understandable.

It's okay. I don't shame myself for that, right, although it's very easy to go into that shame spiral and it's going to happen either way. But I try my best to, first off, allow grace for myself and understanding for myself, but also help other people understand that this is just how I am and it's not purposeful And with that being said, I still have a responsibility..... to make it so I am taking care of myself and setting myself up for the most success while having ADHD, and not affecting other people around me because of my ADHD in a poor or negative way.

I still have that responsibility, right? So, two things can be true. We can give ourself grace. We don't have to shame ourselves for our disorder, but we also still have that responsibility, and we shouldn't make it an excuse for not doing something about it.

And so, what I've... feel like I've really mastered a lot, and again, have ha- had the privilege of mastering, is instead of trying the same things that everybody else tells you to do, like the neurotypical, normal, maybe, organization influencer tells you to do, I figure out what works for me and my brain. I am very realistic about my own expectations of myself and my own patterns, and I discover and I try and I change the things and the ways that I show up, and I put systems into place that make it so I either have no choice but to follow through with it, so there's accountability, that it is as easy as possible for me to get done the task because it is so streamlined and so organized preemptively, or it's completely automated, delegated off of my plate. Or, I just don't do it, and I don't expect it of myself 'cause I know it's not realistic for me to actually get it done or do it well.

And I think that that's been a really big secret and very, uh, important thing for me to do in my own personal life, but especially in my business. And it's gotten me to where I am today, and it's always evolving and changing, the solutions that I put into place. But it's so exciting when I get to add more of those things and evolve more of those things within my own business, and I see how much more efficient I can be, and how much less shame I feel because I just accept the fact that this is who I am, and therefore I need these systems to make things better. Right?

Instead of holding myself to a, a unreasonable standard that I know I'm not gonna hit, I take things one step at a time, and I make it so I'm realistic enough and I put the solutions in place so that way I can actually follow through, and it feels very, very good. And being able to share those same systems with people like you, my friend, who are listening to this right now, and helping you automate those things and making all of this so much easier, that heavy weight of growing and maintaining the business, with all the shit that you have to do and all the things that you have to remember to do throughout your day-to-day. Helping y'all do that is, like, my biggest passion. And I've been doing it for six years now, and it is just so beautiful when people have those things in place so that way they can just focus on being creative and focusing on the high leverage tasks, and actually following through with the big new ideas that you have.

Like, you can't... You won't have the capacity, the mental space to be able to do that sustainably unless the little stuff that is not easy or consistent for you to follow through with, you have to get that stuff off of your plate first or else there's never gonna be room for that big stuff, and it's such a privilege to be able to help y'all do that the same way that I have. And now a word from our sponsors. When I went out on my own as a hairstylist, I quickly realized that running your own business is more complex than most people anticipate, right?

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You can go to the link in my show notes and use "MODERN" to get 50% off your first two months of their gold or platinum plan to see for yourself. I think one of the things that you have said that I think was so powerful is that you don't treat ADHD as a reason that you, like, can't do something. You treat it as a consideration when it comes to designing your approach. And so, I know a big part of that, and I think that's, like, is so, again, so helpful because I feel like this applies to a lot of the independent stylists as well because there's just, you know, neurodivergent or, or not, there's also just the case of having so many things on your mind.

So, I feel like a lot of these strategies and these ways that you've, you know, been able to build your business apply to the person who's also, like, really overwhelmed with all of the tasks that they have to do. And a big part of that is creating systems that allow for consistency, 'cause we're gonna talk about this more on next week's episode where we get into some of the survey results. But, like, surprise, surprise, consistency when it comes to your client experience, when it comes to the things that your clients expect from you, is massively important, which you've been saying, of course, for years. And so, can you talk a little bit about the...

'Cause I think when we hear systems, sometimes we think, like, that's just automations or that's, like, just for the technology side, but I feel like it also goes into just, like, different modes of operating. Can you talk about that a little bit?W- Yes . Like, absolutely yes, dude.

I love this, this topic, um, because, yeah, like, when we hear system, I think our brains immediately go to, like, technology or something like that. Totally. When in reality, I mean, prior to technology, there has been systems that people and, and organizations and governments and humanity has put into place for eons, you know, since the beginning of humanity, right? Um, I'll give you guys a really simple system, a super simple system that helped, that has helped me.

I haven't been super consistent with it, but I'm giving myself grace for it, is, I, I went through a m- a moment in time in which I felt as if, like, being on my phone at night before going to bed and then also waking up and immediately scrolling after picking up my phone was, like, not good for me, and I don't really feel like that right now, so maybe, you know, when that does happen to me again, I'll pick this back up 'cause it was really effective. A literal, like the simplest example of this, of a system, is leaving your phone away from reach next to your bed, right? Putting it in another room before you go to bed, right? That is a system, right?

Correct. That is a sy- system that you set up for yourself to ensure follow-through, consistency, to even remove something that may not be healthy for you. Um, another example of this, and although it has technology intertwined, the actual action or strategy itself is not really necessarily technology, it's just how you approach the business, which is, like, online booking only. So, like, I had a really bad habit of over-booking myself, so if I was going to be pre-booking a client in-person or if I was gonna be texting them back, texting back and forth with a client, I would feel this urgency to get them in because they're a new client and I don't want to let them go and I wanna take, take on as much business as I possibly can, so I would come in early, stay late on my days off, and I'd screw myself over.

So, I moved to a no pre-booking, online booking only system, right? Where th- that's the only way that you can get an appointment with me, so that way, I am no longer able to screw myself over, right? I have no choice. I, I, it's now it's the, now it's the online booking.

It's off of my plate. Something else is doing that for me. It's a systematized boundary, you could call it, right? So, those are types of things that, uh, could be systems for you.

Another thing is just straight-up documentation, okay? You talked about earlier, Jodi, um, uh, how, like, you know, a, a really big part of this is, like, just things are just swirling around in your brain all the fucking time. I mean, I, that's, I mean, I think that's everybody in one way or another, but I mean, especially for ADHD people, especially when we are in, like, a spiral zone because we cannot just follow through all the way with one thought. It's this thought, then that thought, then that thought, then that thought, and it's just all these unwritten endings to things, and it just feels so crazy.

I always say, "If it's not written down, it's not real." Okay? Like, if it's not actually out of your brain, then it is just in the, your soul, you know? And technically your soul isn't really real, you know?

Like, it's just, like, what, we don't, nobody knows what your actual soul is, right? It's just, like, floating out in the universe in one way or another. I don't fucking know. That's not real, right?

Like, eh, your thoughts aren't real. Your thoughts aren't tangible. Correct. And it is so much more difficult to process your thoughts if they aren't written down.

And so it's not just about thoughts. It's also about routines. It's also about how you approach that client experience or your business, uh, uh, uh, responsibilities, especially the ones that you can't automate. So, like, okay, I can't automate this.

I can't delegate it. But what can you do? You can make the task as easy as possible for you to follow through with. How do we do that?

Write down how you go about doing that, and then just follow that plan step by step by step instead of getting super overwhelmed and not knowing where to start because you are only in your thoughts instead of just following a step-by-step plan, right? You know, uh, any of the parents listening will relate to this, but, like, chore charts, I feel like, are, like, the number one example of this because , like, I remember I used to get so frustrated when I'm like, "Oh, like, we've talk- you know, we've talked about this." I wasn't outwardly frustrated, but inwardly, and my son, when he was, like, nine, on his iPod, on the Notes app, made himself a little checky list. Not one day has he actually forgotten since making this list, and I feel like as adults, we have a lot more on our mind than the average, like, you know, 10-year-olds .

So- Yeah. you know, it's, that kind of stuff, I think makes such a huge difference, just writing it down, having something you can check off, and knowing what you have to do as opposed to trying to remember. Yeah, 100%. That's why this is also something that we really focus on in our programs, because as the survey, our most recent survey that we ran, which I am so excited to share the results with you guys for our 2026 Consumer Behavior Survey, um, uh, one of the number one reasons, or the number one reason clients say that they will leave a stylist is if they have an inconsistent experience over and over and over again, okay?

And so, we make it a very big deal to have a written-out system that you follow step by step for the in-the-chair experience so that you are making sure that you're always checking that box for every single thing. The moment that you make a scalp massage a little bit shorter, the moment that you approach your consultation in a different way, the moment that you don't review what you did that day the same way that you did their first appointment, that feels inconsistent. You have now ruined the expectation that this person has set for you in exchange for the money that they're paying you. And so, in Modern Stylist Movement, we walk you through, like, setting all that up with a really clean digital document and documenting those things step by step by step, and it is very, very, very helpful.

Going back to the chore list, I'll be vulnerable here. When I started in the salon when I was 16, I was a 16, little dirty ADHD boy, okay? Like, I just, like, was a mess, all right? And still a mess to this day, and-I, it was my first job ever, okay?

And I remember, and I think that a, I, I feel like if you've been an assistant in a salon, if you've been an owner of a salon, um, you will know what I'm talking about here. I remember every, all, like, my managers and things like that, they would tell me, like, "You just need to take initiative." Like, "You just need to make the place look how you would expect it to look for the client, or the luxury experience." And unfortunately, for somebody like me, that's not enough.

You need to be clearer about what I actually need to do. And especially in that type of circumstance, when I'm a child and I just don't really understand those concepts yet. Don't know. Yeah.

Right? But I mean, even to this day, like, if you want to be held ... If you wanna be holding somebody else to your standards, they should be given a clear rubric of what that looks like. And of course, there is a part of that conversation where, you know, can this person take initiative?

Should I expect them to take initia- initiative? Absolutely. If they're aligned with your core values, they should be able to do so. But you can't also expect them to meet your exact standards, right?

There's only so much initiative somebody can take. And so once we, actually, at the salon, got a checklist for every single day, I was like, "Okay, good. I know exactly what I need to do. I'm gonna do it all and I won't forget anything."

Right? So like, I would go around. I would be, you know, I'd be like, "Oh, okay. I need to go empty these towels out over here and fold them."

Or, "Oh, I need to wipe down this shampoo bowl. I need to mop the floor." And it would just be from like, one task to another and I wouldn't really see the big picture, and I would just get all discombobulated and maybe I'd forget about one thing or two things, or I wouldn't do something all the way. But with a checklist, with an actual standard set for me, okay?

I'm able to follow through with it. And that goes for my entire life here today. And so writing things down, having systems for everything, if it's only in your brain, then it's not real. So especially from a business perspective.

So you need to have it documented. And that's just one example of a very powerful yet simple system that you can have in your business to help you as a neurodivergent person, or help you even train a team or an assistant, uh, moving forward. I think, like, it is the most underrated. Like, documenting and having something that you can reference and actually, like, look at because you're right.

You never know which part of the client experience your client is looking forward to. Like, it can be something so simple, like, you know, I didn't pick up a coffee 'cause my stylist always offers me a coffee. Yeah. And then I get there and they don't.

And then, you know, like, I've got no coffee that morning. Or like, I'm really looking forward to the scalp massage, or whatever part of it. And so, I do think, like you said, it's just creating that consistency, creating that system, creating something that you can follow is helpful, absolutely, for the neurodivergent brain, but also for the people who are just overwhelmed and, you know, maybe just don't remember all of the things- Yeah. 'cause you got so much going on.

Yeah. And thinking burns calories. Like, it takes your brain energy to do things, right? So you only have such a finite amount of energy throughout the day.

You want to be able to spend your energy on the highest leverage tasks, the highest growth tasks, the biggest creative tasks, instead of like, the little stupid shit. Or, you want to do those tasks well. So for example, another thing that we make sure is a systematized, documented thing, is like, your marketing plan, right? Like, how you are actually going to onboard or find new clients, and onboard them, right?

Like, any, any marketing department in any company is always going to have some sort of plan for the year. I mean, I can't tell you how many my mom, how many times my mom is telling me that she has her plan, her strategic plan meeting today. She's the vice president of marketing for a bank. And I'm like, "Damn, y'all are having these fucking meetings every quarter."

Like, "What the hell? Y'all creating a plan all the time." And it, and it's actually like, it, it makes sense. You know, I'm doing the same damn thing for ...

I'm pivoting all the time and having a plan, having a system to follow when we, as ADHD, creative high performers, we have a million different ideas. We have a million different things that we could be doing. When we understand what the main focus is and when we have a list that we can always go back to when we don't know what to work on or we feel overwhelmed, that can just help us move forward in such a more effective way. Even the small task of posting on social media, making a blog post, just having a system for how you go about doing that, and having a rubric for what a good social media post actually looks like for yourself, is very helpful for you actually following through with things easily and effectively.

Not to mention, it's very scalable. If you decide to hire someone one day, which you may not even be thinking about right now, but maybe you should if you're a high performer, then that can be really helpful if your brain and what's in it, and how you approach things is already documented to be able to pass onto the next person. So, we love systems over here for the ADHD entrepreneur, and I teach a whole lot about these systems within my programs. For our mastermind people, we create really specific automations and systems for you as a high performer to be able to make things as easy as possible, create a next level client experience without you having to do more manual work or remember to do things, right?

Just by the seat of your pants. And I would really love to work with you in those ways. We have a really exciting thing coming up very, very soon that I'm excited to roll out to you, that you can join us in. And we'll talk to you more about that in the next couple episodes.

But thank you so much for tuning in to this episode of The Modern Hairstylist podcast. Shout out to all my ADHDers out there. You are capable of so much more than society and your self believe. Okay?

Like, it is so easy to look at everybody else around you, even maybe people with ADHD, okay, who are doing the things that you would like to do, who are, quote unquote, "doing things better than you," but I promise you, you are exactly where you need to be. You are okay as you are. And there's a reason why you may not feel as if you are as ahead, and it most likely be, it- it most likely is because you are holding yourself to an unrealistic standard for yourself. You need to hold yourself to your own standard.

Get realistic with what you want, and then create solutions to make it so you meet yourself there. So much love to you. Have a blessed rest of your day. Peace out, girl scout.

Bye bye.

End of transcript. © 2026 Hunter Donia LLC.